Your Holidays (and Life) Don’t Have to Look Like They Used To

Published 8 days ago • 2 min read

Hey there, Reader!

The holidays are here, and with them comes the familiar pressure to make everything just right. You know the drill—family traditions, holiday magic, trying to live up to a million “shoulds” to create the perfect season.

But here's what I've been learning (and relearning):

✨ Holding on too tightly to what was can keep us from finding joy in what is.

✨ Sometimes we avoid things that feel too painful, thinking it’ll protect us.

✨ Other times, we cling so hard to the past that we miss the beauty of the present.

Somewhere in between, there’s a sweet spot—a happy medium I’m working on finding.

This hit me hard while cleaning out my mom’s house recently. I found a box of treasures—gifts from my Nana, old photos, and the 50th anniversary edition of Scrabble I got for Christmas back in 1998. For years, I avoided those memories because I thought they’d break me.

But this time, instead of breaking me, they reminded me of something powerful:

Memories aren’t here to hold us back. They’re here to help us carry the best parts of our past forward.

In typical me fashion, I asked Nostalgia what it wanted me to know, and here’s (part of) the message I got quiet enough to hear:

“I’m not here to hold you back or keep you stuck. I’m here to help you carry the best parts of your past forward. Every memory you treasure, every face you see in your mind, is a part of who you are today. Let the memories wash over you. Laugh at the silly moments. Cry for the people who are no longer here. And know that nothing truly loved is ever really lost—it lives on in you.”

You can read the full letter over on Inside Voice: adriennecrowley.substack.com. This is Day 5 of 12 Reflections for the Holiday Season.

Looking Ahead to 2025

Are you doing some big-picture thinking as the new year approaches? Here’s what I’ve realized:

Holding onto things that don’t feel right—even when they “work”—is exhausting.

Yes, change is scary. But the upfront discomfort of letting go is always less painful than the long-term torment of staying stuck in something that doesn’t fit anymore.

That’s why I hit pause on my podcast and gave it a total refresh.

🎧 Introducing Better Days Start Today | Feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or wondering what’s next after life’s knocked you down? Whether you’re processing grief, rebuilding after a life-changing event, or just tired of going through the motions, this podcast is your invitation to stop waiting for “someday” and start creating better days—right now.

New episodes drop every Thursday, starting with the full story behind the pivot and the reason why.

One Last Thing: The Holidays Don’t Have to Be Perfect

This season (and your life) doesn’t have to look the way it used to—or the way anyone else’s does. It can be whatever you make it, and that’s more than enough.

With love,

Adrienne

P.S. If the holidays feel like too much or you’re stuck in the space between what was and what could be, let’s talk about it. Join me for Empowerment Hour, a complimentary group session where you’ll uncover what’s holding you back and discover tools to help you feel more grounded, clear, and capable of moving forward. It’s not about fixing everything overnight—it’s about taking one powerful step toward a life that feels aligned and doable.

This is your chance to reconnect with yourself and start creating the future you deserve. Sign up now—it’s happening December 19th from 6 PM to 7:00 PM PST!

SAVE YOUR SEAT